so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
