would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
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