Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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