never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Randomize
