We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Randomize