Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Randomize
