but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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