you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Randomize
