After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
my liver is dry heaving
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Randomize
