fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
