Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize