Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I have already put on my inside pants.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
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