I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
