they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Randomize
