is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize
