i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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