Where is the hickey?
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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