even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
