His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
