He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
Dignity is for republicans.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
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