Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
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