giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Randomize
