he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
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