I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Found the puke drawer
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
