i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Randomize
