I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Randomize
