It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
