Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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