She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
