I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
