Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
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