It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
