the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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