do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
