Kiss
Puke
No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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