What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
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