How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Randomize