wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
