She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
I currently don't understand fingers.
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