its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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