Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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