the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
So apparently I’m into choking now
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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