Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
