Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize