how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
A bitchslap is in order.
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