I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
