Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
