I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
