Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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