he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Randomize
