Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Randomize
